It’s not uncommon in marriage to have the same conflict…over and over again. We often attempt to solve a problem by saying the same, almost rehearsed lines. We think if we say these lines louder, with a hint more of sarcasm, or a more biting insult than the last time, our spouse will magically snap out of their assault on our character and see the world the way we want them to.
The real problem? Well, the problem is not what you are arguing about. The problem is in how you argue, or theprocess, not what you are saying, which is the content. In marriage, it can be hard to snap out of the insane cycle of arguing the same way over and over again. That is what counseling is for. Marriage counseling opens you up to seeing the process, which is more than likely a concoction of how our family of origin managed conflicts, our wounds, and our beliefs about marriage being poorly expressed to our spouse. Here is a rather humorous take on how we do this from Studio C, cleverly tilted “Every Fight Ever.”
If you are stuck in a rut with your marriage or family and having the same conflict, get help today and take your marriage, or your life for that matter, back.